It’s 11 pm on a Sunday night. Most of the seniors in AP English are caffeinated, frantically trying to read the last 300 pages of their book, angrily tweeting, and getting ready to make an 11:11 wish for their own death. Where am I? Sleeping in my bed, because I spent 15 minutes reading Sparknotes instead of 5 hours reading the whole novel. Some of you may think this is cheating, or taking the easy way out. But what it really is, my friends, is the best decision anyone could ever make. Teachers say not to skip out on reading because they’ll fail the test over the book, but I didn’t read a page of Huck Finn and still got an 89% on the test. That’s better than some people who actually read the whole thing!
So next time you’re wasting your precious time reading about a Puritan slut and her devil-child, here’s a list of better things you could be doing instead.
-Taking a bubble bath
-Inventing a robot butler
-Raising an abandoned duckling
-Making cupcakes for the B lunch senior patio
-Hunting communists
-Finding a cure for cancer
…the possibilities are endless!!
By: Little Irish Girl (to be pronounced in a Spanish accent)
No comments:
Post a Comment